DISCLAIMER: I’m sorry for offending anyone who is soft enough to take this post as rude rather than the funny thing that it is.

Or maybe I’m not sorry. Either way, this needs to be said.

There is an interesting clientele circling the Lynryd Skynard circuit this summer. Where has this group been hiding their overall-selves?

Buc-ces?

[I’m sorry. I’m sorry, geez. But listen. If you’ve been to a Buc-ces and you then went to an actual Buc-ces AGAIN. Like. For a second time, I mean.]

Why?

Annnnyway. They’re country. And they’re old.

The demographic at the Skynyrd concert is a force to be reckoned with. I spotted shirts with statements such as:

Thou shalt not try me ~Mood 24/7
Life is too short to drink bad bourbon.
Ain’t nobody’s bi*@h.

And the piece de resistance?

Uranus Gas and Lube Co.

That’s gutsy right there.

Also, you can zoom in on that photo and see all of the baldy-slash-gray hair. Not that I did that or anything. But I did. And what I’m saying is that there’s quite a bit of knowledge and life experience in that photo.

Did I mention there was also ZZTop? Or I think it’s just ZTop now because there’s only one original member of the double Z left. So that replacement is just…a replacement. Anyway, that caused the Fashion Scale to lean a tad to The Long Gray Beard side.

Also, binoculars. But listen. We weren’t that far back! So many people brought the same binoculars that they’d been using just 2 hours earlier to watch their backyard bluebirds feed their babies. Genius move.

Wait.

There’s also Canes.

My goodness at the canes. I could tell when a song was well loved because The Cane Owner would raise that stick high and proud and pump-pump-pump to the beat of the drum.

Now that’s a good song right there.

And what’s with the medical-grade gloves with the fingers missing? I’m serious what is that and do I need them? With as many people wearing those jokers I feel like there’s a fun and helpful secret here. Let’s also not forget the side holster for the iPhones. The Skynyrd fan in front of us was the trifecta:

Cane + Special Secret Gloves + Side Holster for phone

Y’all….now I’m not kidding you on this…when he whipped out that phone to take videos of his favorites it was like he was behind a wooden barrel at that OK Corral Shootout.

Yosemite Sam.

And during the blank space of time between artists I noticed the font size on these phones. Most certainly the largest font possible. Like when Apple was designing these things The Head of the Font Department said, “Let’s pretend I’m posting in the Birdwatching Facebook Group. Give me THAT size font.”

Honestly though. They were a fun group, I’m tellin you. That demographic last night didn’t care what ANYone thought. They’ve been around too long and if they’re in an HOA community they ain’t followin’ the rules, I can promise you that. In 20 years though, when this post also adequately describes the Dave Matthews Band fans? PLEASE allow me to hook my peacock cane to the back of your seat. You can read over my shoulder at all my social media posts if you want. They’ll probably be about birds.

Or binoculars.