I say ‘this month’ because The Dumbness resets itself every 30 days. I’m bound to do another idiotic thing in about 2 weeks.

This season I decided to get a head start on Christmas shopping and start mid-November.

I know. I know.

There are some over achievers that are finished by August.

You are not reading her blog.

Also, I found this new thing called Zulilly which most normal people already know about.

You are not reading her blog either.

So, back in November I ordered a not-so-inexpensive activity cube for the baby of the house.

This is a picture of said baby earning her keep around here.

After I ordered the cube, I received an email confirmation and later, a shipping notification.

How handy.

Zip ahead to December 6th and I’m now wondering where the darn thing is.

Quickly check the email again.

Click on ‘tracking’ to see where that joker is.

DELIVERED TO SIDE DOOR NOVEMBER 17TH.

That’s what it said.

Y’all. I don’t remember getting it and now I am beginning to flip my lid a bit.

I start searching all over the house thinking that I must have hidden it somewhere.

Nope.

I start searching all in the garage thinking that I must have stacked it along with the other deliveries.

Nope.

I start checking the house to see just how many ‘side door’ locations there are around here.

One.

Oh my. Cheese and crackers….

IT WAS STOLEN.

Some Jack Leg has taken my baby girl’s CHRISTMAS PRESENT.

I am now one of those people who catch criminals on their home security cameras stealing packages right out from under their noses.

Except we don’t have a security camera.

I told my neighbor about the thief.

Every so often I would open the side door (The Drop Zone) and look around at my neighborhood. My, my, my. How could this happen HERE? We don’t STEAL! Like I always tell my mom, ‘People around here don’t want your stuff…they already have their own and chances are it’s 75% better than what you got anyway’.

Now I’m beginning to doubt that idea.

Each time the FedEx guy drove by? I scowled at him.

When I would see the UPS lady? I’d blame her in my brain.

I blamed the Publix meat cutter man. I don’t trust anyone in a green polyester apron.

The water delivery guy. Yep. It was him. He’s so shady.

I stood in my driveway, non-organic eggs in hand, ready to whirl them at the USPS lady if she even looked in my general direction.

SOMEONE HAS STOLEN MY LEAD FREE NOT-SO-CHEAP ACTIVITY CUBE IN PBA FREE PACKAGING.

Are you guys even paying attention to this news?

So much for getting a head start on shopping this year.

After a couple of days, I got over it a little. I ordered a new activity cube. Searched high and low for the best deal. Paid extra for quick shipping just in case. Making sure it was delivered on time.

And then? TEN MINUTES LATER….

You know how? If you lose something? The moment you order another one the original shows up?

Yeah. That.

Pffft.

Whatever.