May 10, 2018

My day: what it looks like with a toddler and big girls

Oftentimes people ask stay at home moms what they do all day.

How sweet of them.

Why don’t they ever ask the accountant what she does all day?  Or the teacher?  Or let’s ask the pediatrician.

How come we don’t ask the IT guru or the CEO what he/she decides to do all day?

Also, why do people assume that stay at home moms are endlessly available?

“Hey.  Since you, STAY HOME all day, would you be able to ….. type my resume/run this up to the courthouse/drive my mother in law to the doctor to get that rash looked at?”

You know what?  Unless the event contains the words “eat” or “food”?  I ain’t doin’ it.

I guess people think that when the kids have all been dropped off at school for the day, that stay at home moms get to do whatever they want.

Oh. Yes.  Of course we do.  So long as “whatever we want” means:

  • laundry
  • vaccumming
  • bill paying
  • sheet changing
  • shower cleaning
  • car washing
  • roofing the house
  • window cleaning

Of course, all moms and families are different, but here’s what MY day typically looks like.

  • wake at 4:49 (why that weird time I do not know) and drive to the gym
  • workout/run/bike for 1 hour
  • back home by 6:25 (I’ve got this timing thing down to a science because I have too many kids)
  • wake Emily and Caroline (wait 30 minutes and wake Allison and Josie)
  • drive Caroline to school by 7:15
  • make sure Emily gets to bus at 7:30
  • get Josie fed and ready for the day
  • leave with Allison and Josie (pick up neighbor kids) at 8:05 (this is every other week)
  • drop off the middle schoolers
  • grab coffee
  • Mon/Wed/Fri Josie and I do random errands next.  Tues/Thurs I drop Josie off at school and then run errands
  • back home to do whatever chores are assigned that day: vacuum is a daily thing so I don’t count that.
  • have snacks
  • play outside/go for a walk with Josie
  • nap time for Josie
  • pay bills/clean kitchen/send emails/clickinmoms
  • 23 minute nap for me (3 minutes to fall asleep and 20 minutes to actually sleep)
  • wake Josie and give snack
  • walk to the bus stop to meet Caroline
  • play outside with the little girls
  • help with homework
  • prep dinner or plan what I’m going to ORDER for dinner
  • let girls watch TV
  • play outside with the girls
  • Emily gets home
  • play/bake/snack/straighten up
  • walk to the bus stop to meet Allison
  • finish prepping dinner/play outside
  • Caroline to violin (Mondays)/Allison to soccer (M/W/Th)
  • eat dinner
  • play outside/go for a walk/paint/finish homework while Allison is at soccer
  • bathe Josie and put to bed (she will ask for 5 books.  Always does.)
  • get Allison from soccer
  • make sure Allison eats dinner and finishes homework
  • wind down/talk with girls/listen to Emily’s guitar magic/watch Little House on the Prairie
  • tell Caroline 432 times to GO TO BED
  • Caroline will say “come to my room and talk to me” 784 times
  • upload images/videos taken from the day
  • go up and talk to Caroline
  • edit an image or two
  • beg the big girls to go to sleep
  • hang out with Tony
  • say I’m going to sleep, but spend 20 more minutes doing random jobs along the way

And there you have it.

Let me add that I hope you don’t feel like I’m saying that stay at home moms have it harder than working moms because that’s certainly NOT what I’m saying.  Both are hard and for different reasons.  Honestly, I am not sure how working moms work all day and then come home to cook/clean/do homework/etc.  You guys are awesome!  I guess it is just tricky for many people to understand what stay at home moms DO with all of THEIR time.  It’s awkward for us to try and explain how much time we DON’T have; especially when we feel like others see our “I don’t have time” reasons as invalid.  Does that make sense?  “Why don’t you chaperone the 4th grade field trip?  You stay home.”  or  “How come you can’t be the PTA secretary?”

Well.  The main reason is because I DO NOT HAVE TIME.

But another good reason is….

I’m more of a Donates Kleenex and Money type of parent.

Also.  I’m tired.

But thanks.




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